25 Things to Say When Someone Calls You Insecure

Facing criticism or negative comments about one’s self-esteem or confidence can be tough. It’s not uncommon to feel cornered or defensive when someone labels you as insecure.

However, responding to such comments can be an opportunity to showcase your confidence, wit, and emotional intelligence.

Whether in personal conversations, professional settings, or social interactions, knowing the right things to say can turn an awkward or hurtful moment into one of strength and poise.

What to Say When Someone Calls You Insecure

what to say when someone calls you insecure

1. Thank you for sharing your perspective. I see things differently.

This response is perfect for when you want to acknowledge the other person’s opinion without agreeing with them. It shows that you’re open to different viewpoints but remain confident in your own beliefs and feelings. Use this when you want to defuse the situation without escalating it.

2. I appreciate your concern. I’m actually working on understanding myself better.

This reply is ideal for moments when you wish to show that you’re self-aware and constantly in a state of personal development. It indicates that you recognize your own journey of growth without seeing it as a flaw. Best used when the comment comes from someone you believe genuinely cares about you.

3. It’s interesting you feel that way. Can you explain why?

Asking for clarification shows that you’re not immediately jumping to defense and are interested in understanding the other person’s point of view. It’s a strategic way to either find a ground for meaningful discussion or to highlight the baselessness of their claim. This is especially effective in professional settings where rationale is valued.

4. I’m sorry you think that. I’m comfortable with where I am at the moment.

This response gently shuts down the conversation on the topic, indicating that you don’t share their viewpoint and are not looking for external validation. It’s particularly useful in social situations where prolonged discussion on the matter might not be appropriate or welcome.

5. Insecurity is a human emotion, and I’m okay with feeling it sometimes.

This reply acknowledges the complexity of human emotions and the fact that feeling insecure at times is a universal experience. It shows depth, understanding, and acceptance of oneself, turning the comment into a moment of vulnerability and strength. It’s great for more personal conversations.

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6. We all have areas we’re working on. What are yours?

Flipping the conversation to invite the other person to share their own experiences or challenges can shift the focus from you to a more general discussion about growth and self-improvement. This can foster empathy and possibly create a more meaningful connection.

7. I wonder what made you feel compelled to say that. Let’s talk about it.

This response is an invitation for a deeper conversation, suggesting that their comment might be reflecting something more about their feelings or perceptions. It’s a way to explore underlying issues without being defensive. Suitable for close relationships where you can engage in honest dialogue.

8. Everyone’s confidence levels fluctuate, and that’s perfectly normal.

Highlighting the normalcy of fluctuating confidence levels can help normalize the conversation about insecurities, indicating that you don’t see it as a deficiency. This response is great for when you want to educate or share a broader perspective on the issue.

9. I’m focusing on the positives in my life and working through my challenges.

This shows that you’re proactive about your personal development and prefer to focus on the positive aspects of your life. It’s an optimistic response that steers the conversation towards a more positive tone, suitable for both personal and professional settings.

10. That’s an interesting observation. How do you handle feelings of insecurity?

Turning the question around to ask about their methods of handling insecurity not only deflects the focus but also opens up a dialogue for sharing strategies and experiences. This can be a constructive way to handle such comments, especially in a peer group or team environment.

11. My self-worth isn’t defined by one aspect or opinion.

This response emphasizes the multifaceted nature of self-esteem and self-worth, showing that you understand your value isn’t determined by a single perspective or flaw. It’s particularly effective in situations where someone’s comment might seem overly critical or narrow-minded.

12. I’m learning to embrace all parts of myself, including my insecurities.

Here, you’re acknowledging that personal growth involves accepting not just strengths but also weaknesses. This response is powerful in its vulnerability and can disarm the other person by showing that you see insecurities as part of the human condition. It’s best used in a supportive or empathetic environment.

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13. Thanks for pointing that out. I’m always open to constructive feedback.

By framing the comment as potentially constructive feedback, you show openness to growth and self-improvement. This response is wise in professional settings where feedback is a part of personal development, indicating that you value growth opportunities.

14. I prefer to focus on my progress rather than dwell on any perceived insecurities.

Highlighting your focus on progress rather than getting bogged down by insecurities showcases a growth mindset. This reply is suited for situations where you want to assert your positive outlook and commitment to personal development.

15. It’s okay to feel insecure sometimes; it’s part of being real and authentic.

This response champions authenticity and the acceptance of real human emotions. It’s a way to reframe the concept of insecurity as not just a weakness but a sign of authenticity. Use this in more personal or intimate discussions where vulnerability is valued.

16. I believe in constructive self-critique, not in dwelling on negativity.

Distinguishing between constructive self-reflection and negative self-focus, this reply asserts a healthy approach to personal growth. It’s effective in contexts where you want to make clear your commitment to self-improvement without getting trapped in negativity.

17. We all have our moments, but I choose not to define myself by them.

This response puts temporary feelings of insecurity into perspective, emphasizing choice and agency in self-identity. It’s a powerful statement in any conversation, indicating resilience and a positive self-concept.

18. I find strength in acknowledging my areas for improvement.

Here, you’re flipping the script to see acknowledgment of insecurities as a strength rather than a weakness. This response is ideal for moments when you want to communicate a proactive and positive stance towards personal development.

19. Your observation gives me something to think about. I’m all for self-discovery.

Taking the comment as an opportunity for self-reflection, this reply shows that you’re thoughtful and open-minded. It’s a graceful way to accept feedback without agreeing or disagreeing, suitable for both personal and professional interactions.

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20. Insecurity is just one piece of the complex puzzle that is me.

This philosophical response highlights the complexity of individual identity, suggesting that insecurities are just one aspect among many. It’s an elegant way to acknowledge the comment without giving it undue weight, appropriate for more reflective or in-depth conversations.

21. I’m confident in my journey, including the ups and downs.

Expressing confidence not just in the destination but in the journey itself, including its challenges, underscores a holistic view of personal growth. This response is empowering and can be used in almost any context to demonstrate resilience and optimism.

22. It’s through challenges that I grow stronger and more self-aware.

Positioning challenges, including dealing with insecurities, as opportunities for growth, this reply emphasizes the positive outcomes of facing personal difficulties. It’s an inspiring response for situations where you want to highlight your proactive approach to life’s hurdles.

23. I respect your viewpoint, but I also trust my own journey and experiences.

By balancing respect for the other person’s opinion with trust in your own experiences, this response maintains both civility and self-assurance. It’s well-suited for discussions where differing views are being expressed respectfully.

24. I’m more focused on my capabilities and how I can grow from every experience.

Centering the conversation on capabilities and growth, this reply shifts the focus from insecurities to potential and development. It’s a forward-thinking and positive response, ideal for professional or aspirational contexts.

25. Everyone’s path is unique, including how we confront our insecurities. I’m on my own path.

This response celebrates individuality and the personal nature of growth and self-improvement. It’s a gentle reminder that everyone’s experiences and ways of handling insecurities are different, making it a respectful and understanding conclusion to such conversations.


Each of these responses is tailored to handle situations with grace, showing that you’re in control of your emotions and reactions. Whether you’re seeking to shut down the conversation, open up a dialogue, or simply acknowledge the comment without letting it affect you, these replies can help you navigate through the moment with confidence and poise.