20 Ways to Politely Ask the Guest If They Are Coming

When hosting events, whether professional or personal, knowing your guest list is crucial for planning purposes. However, asking guests whether they plan to attend can be a bit awkward, especially when trying to maintain politeness and respect their decisions. The key is to phrase your inquiry in a way that is courteous, clear, and considerate.

This article will explore 20 different ways to politely ask a guest if they are planning to attend an event, along with explanations on the appropriateness of each approach and the best context for their use.

How to Politely Ask the Guest If They Are Coming

how to politely ask the guest if they are coming

1. Direct Inquiry with a Warm Tone

“We are finalizing the arrangements for the event and would love to know if you’ll be able to join us. Could you please let us know your plans at your earliest convenience?”

This straightforward question is appropriate in a formal or semi-formal setting. The warm tone keeps it friendly and approachable.

2. Expressing Eagerness to See Them

“We’re really looking forward to hopefully seeing you at [event]. Have you had a chance to decide if you’ll be able to make it?”

This approach is suitable when you have a friendly relationship with the guest. It expresses eagerness to see them, adding a personal touch.

3. Highlighting the Importance of Their Presence

“Your presence at [event] would mean a lot to us. Are you able to confirm your attendance?”

Use this when the guest’s presence is particularly important. It emphasizes the value of their attendance.

4. Mentioning Planning Needs

“As we are in the midst of planning [event], it would be helpful to know if we should expect you. Could you kindly let us know?”

This is appropriate for any event where accurate planning is crucial. It gently nudges the guest to respond for logistical reasons.

5. Offering a Gentle Reminder

“Just a gentle reminder to RSVP for [event]. We’re eager to finalize our guest list and would appreciate knowing if you can join us.”

A gentle reminder is effective when a response is needed by a certain date. It’s respectful and suitable for most occasions.

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6. Inquiring About Uncertainty

“We noticed that you haven’t RSVP’d yet for [event]. Is there any information or assistance we can provide to help with your decision?”

This approach is helpful if you suspect the guest might have questions or concerns. It’s considerate and offers assistance.

7. Acknowledging Busy Schedules

“We understand that everyone has busy schedules, and we hope you can fit [event] into yours. Could you let us know if you’ll be able to attend?”

When you want to acknowledge potential schedule conflicts, this response is appropriate. It shows understanding and respect for the guest’s time.

8. Offering Last-Minute Flexibility

“As [event] approaches, we’re accommodating some last-minute confirmations. Do you think you’ll be able to join us?”

Use this when you’re flexible with last-minute confirmations. It’s suitable for more casual events.

9. Casual and Friendly Inquiry

“Hey there! We’re just checking in to see if you’ll be joining us for [event]. Would love to see you there!”

This casual and friendly approach is great for informal events or when you have a close relationship with the guest.

10. Formal and Respectful Request

“We respectfully request your confirmation of attendance at [event]. Your prompt response would be greatly appreciated for our arrangements.”

For formal events or professional settings, this direct yet respectful request is appropriate.

11. Utilizing Humor

“Are we going to have the pleasure of your company at [event], or should we start a countdown to your maybe turning into a yes?”

A humorous approach works well with friends or colleagues you have a jovial relationship with. It keeps the tone light and friendly.

12. Emphasizing Event Details

“As a reminder, [event] will be on [date] at [location]. We’d love to include you in our preparations. Can you confirm your attendance?”

When you want to reiterate event details and encourage a response, this method is effective. It’s informative and to the point.

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13. Reflecting on Past Participation

“We’ve enjoyed having you at our previous events and would be delighted to see you at [event]. Will you be able to make it this time?”

This is suitable when the guest has attended your events before. It shows appreciation for their past participation.

14. Offering Assistance with Arrangements

“If you’re considering attending [event] and need any assistance with arrangements, please let us know. We’re here to help and would love to see you there.”

Use this when you want to offer additional help, which might encourage their attendance. It’s considerate and accommodating.

15. Short and Sweet Check-In

“Just a quick check-in to see if you’ll be joining us for [event]? Looking forward to your reply.”

For a simple and unobtrusive check-in, this brief and pleasant inquiry works well. It’s straightforward and polite.

16. Relating to Event Theme

“As we’re planning some exciting [theme-related activities] for [event], we were wondering if we can expect the pleasure of your company?”

This approach ties in the event’s theme and can spark interest. It’s engaging and appropriate for themed events.

17. Personalized Approach

“I was thinking about how much fun we had last time and would love to know if you’re coming to [event]. Your presence always adds so much!”

A personalized approach is effective for guests with whom you have a personal history. It adds a touch of sentiment.

18. Acknowledging Their Contribution

“Your input and presence at [event] would be invaluable. Have you decided if you’ll be able to attend?”

Use this when the guest’s contribution or input is significant. It shows that their presence is not just wanted but also valued.

19. Phrasing as an Expectation

“We’re expecting a wonderful turnout for [event] and are hoping you’ll be among our esteemed guests. Can we count on your presence?”

This is suitable when you want to convey that their attendance is expected and would be esteemed.

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20. Incorporating RSVP Reminder

“As we’re nearing the RSVP deadline for [event], we wanted to reach out and see if you’ll be joining us. Your prompt response would aid us greatly in our planning.”

When an RSVP deadline is approaching, this response is effective. It’s a polite reminder that also highlights the importance of their timely response.


Asking guests about their attendance doesn’t have to be uncomfortable or impolite. These various approaches offer a range of tones and styles to suit different events and relationships. The key is to be clear, courteous, and considerate of the guest’s circumstances, making the process of confirming attendance as smooth and pleasant as possible.