In various social situations, particularly when dining out or organizing group activities, the topic of payment can be a delicate one. There are times when it’s necessary to communicate that each person will be responsible for their own expenses, commonly known as ‘going Dutch’.
However, conveying this message requires tact and consideration to avoid any misunderstanding or discomfort.
Polite Ways to Say, “Everyone Pays for Themselves”
This article provides 20 polite ways to express that everyone will be paying for themselves, each designed for use in different scenarios and with various relationships.
1. “Shall we split the bill evenly?”
Response: “Shall we split the bill evenly?”
Appropriateness: This question is a tactful way to suggest that everyone pays an equal share. It’s suitable for situations where each person’s order is roughly the same cost.
Example Dialogue:
Friend: “How should we handle the bill?”
You: “Shall we split the bill evenly?”
2. “Let’s each take care of our own tab, if that’s alright.”
Response: “Let’s each take care of our own tab, if that’s alright.”
Appropriateness: This suggestion is polite and straightforward, ideal for when you are with a group that values clarity and fairness.
Example Dialogue:
Colleague: “What’s the plan for lunch payment?”
You: “Let’s each take care of our own tab, if that’s alright.”
3. “How about we all pay individually this time?”
Response: “How about we all pay individually this time?”
Appropriateness: This phrase is suitable for situations where you might have previously shared expenses, but this time, individual payments are preferred.
Example Dialogue:
Friend: “Are we putting this all on one card?”
You: “How about we all pay individually this time?”
4. “I propose we go Dutch on this meal.”
Response: “I propose we go Dutch on this meal.”
Appropriateness: The term ‘going Dutch’ is widely understood as a way to indicate that each person pays for themselves. It’s a clear and direct approach.
Example Dialogue:
Family Member: “How will we settle the bill?”
You: “I propose we go Dutch on this meal.”
5. “Could we each cover our own expenses tonight?”
Response: “Could we each cover our own expenses tonight?”
Appropriateness: This question is a respectful way to suggest individual payment while leaving room for others to agree or propose an alternative.
Example Dialogue:
Friend: “Should one person pay first and others pay them back?”
You: “Could we each cover our own expenses tonight?”
6. “I think it’s easiest if everyone handles their own bill.”
Response: “I think it’s easiest if everyone handles their own bill.”
Appropriateness: This phrase is effective in situations where the practicality of individual payments is emphasized, ideal for a group that values simplicity and convenience.
Example Dialogue:
Colleague: “How shall we handle payment for the team dinner?”
You: “I think it’s easiest if everyone handles their own bill.”
7. “Perhaps it’s best if we all settle our own checks?”
Response: “Perhaps it’s best if we all settle our own checks?”
Appropriateness: Framing it as a suggestion, this phrase is appropriate in a context where you are offering an option rather than enforcing a rule.
Example Dialogue:
Friend: “How are we paying for the meal?”
You: “Perhaps it’s best if we all settle our own checks?”
8. “Let’s each pay for what we ordered, to keep it simple.”
Response: “Let’s each pay for what we ordered, to keep it simple.”
Appropriateness: This response is great for situations where orders vary significantly in price, ensuring fairness.
Example Dialogue:
Family Member: “How will we split this?”
You: “Let’s each pay for what we ordered, to keep it simple.”
9. “Would everyone be okay with handling their own costs today?”
Response: “Would everyone be okay with handling their own costs today?”
Appropriateness: This phrasing is considerate, as it checks in with everyone’s comfort level regarding individual payments.
Example Dialogue:
Friend: “Are we doing a group payment?”
You: “Would everyone be okay with handling their own costs today?”
10. “I suggest we each pay separately to avoid any confusion.”
Response: “I suggest we each pay separately to avoid any confusion.”
Appropriateness: This suggestion is practical and helps to avoid potential misunderstandings related to bill splitting.
Example Dialogue:
Colleague: “How should we settle the bill?”
You: “I suggest we each pay separately to avoid any confusion.”
11. “Is everyone comfortable with paying for their own meal?”
Response: “Is everyone comfortable with paying for their own meal?”
Appropriateness: This question is inclusive and shows consideration for everyone’s comfort level, making it suitable for situations where group dynamics are diverse.
Example Dialogue:
Friend: “How are we doing the bill?”
You: “Is everyone comfortable with paying for their own meal?”
12. “To make things easier, let’s all handle our own expenses.”
Response: “To make things easier, let’s all handle our own expenses.”
Appropriateness: This response emphasizes ease and convenience, making it a practical suggestion for group outings.
Example Dialogue:
Colleague: “How will we sort out the bill?”
You: “To make things easier, let’s all handle our own expenses.”
13. “It might be simpler if we each just pay for ourselves.”
Response: “It might be simpler if we each just pay for ourselves.”
Appropriateness: Suggesting simplicity in payment, this response is effective in a group where straightforward solutions are appreciated.
Example Dialogue:
Friend: “Should we split this evenly?”
You: “It might be simpler if we each just pay for ourselves.”
14. “Each of us covering our own costs seems fair, don’t you think?”
Response: “Each of us covering our own costs seems fair, don’t you think?”
Appropriateness: This response introduces the idea as a fair solution, inviting others to agree or discuss it further.
Example Dialogue:
Family Member: “How will we handle the dinner bill?”
You: “Each of us covering our own costs seems fair, don’t you think?”
15. “I’m in favor of everyone taking care of their own bill. What about you?”
Response: “I’m in favor of everyone taking care of their own bill. What about you?”
Appropriateness: This phrase is engaging and seeks the opinion of others, making it suitable for a democratic decision-making process.
Example Dialogue:
Colleague: “Are we splitting the bill?”
You: “I’m in favor of everyone taking care of their own bill. What about you?”
16. “Let’s keep it simple – everyone pays for what they’ve ordered.”
Response: “Let’s keep it simple – everyone pays for what they’ve ordered.”
Appropriateness: This suggestion works well in a situation where orders are significantly different, ensuring that everyone pays fairly for what they have consumed.
Example Dialogue:
Friend: “How should we settle the bill?”
You: “Let’s keep it simple – everyone pays for what they’ve ordered.”
17. “Should we just handle our own bills to keep things straightforward?”
Response: “Should we just handle our own bills to keep things straightforward?”
Appropriateness: Framed as a question, this phrase suggests individual payments as a straightforward approach, suitable for groups who prefer clear and uncomplicated solutions.
Example Dialogue:
Colleague: “How will we deal with the bill for our team lunch?”
You: “Should we just handle our own bills to keep things straightforward?”
18. “I’d suggest that each of us pays separately this time.”
Response: “I’d suggest that each of us pays separately this time.”
Appropriateness: This response is a gentle suggestion that respects the group’s previous payment methods, while proposing a change for the current situation.
Example Dialogue:
Family Member: “Are we doing a joint payment for the meal?”
You: “I’d suggest that each of us pays separately this time.”
19. “If it’s alright with everyone, let’s all take care of our own orders.”
Response: “If it’s alright with everyone, let’s all take care of our own orders.”
Appropriateness: This phrase is considerate and seeks consensus, making it a respectful way to suggest individual payments.
Example Dialogue:
Friend: “Are we splitting the bill or paying individually?”
You: “If it’s alright with everyone, let’s all take care of our own orders.”
20. “I think it might be best for each of us to pay our own way.”
Response: “I think it might be best for each of us to pay our own way.”
Appropriateness: This straightforward yet polite suggestion is suitable for a group where clear communication is valued and respected.
Example Dialogue:
Colleague: “How should we handle payment for the event?”
You: “I think it might be best for each of us to pay our own way.”
Wrap-up
Navigating the conversation around payments in social situations can be challenging, but with the right phrasing, it’s possible to convey the message that everyone should pay for themselves in a manner that is both polite and clear.
The above responses offer various ways to approach this topic, ensuring that you can maintain harmony and fairness in your social interactions. Choosing the right expression depends on the context, the relationship with the group, and the nature of the event.
With these polite suggestions, you can effectively communicate your message without causing discomfort or misunderstanding.